An area man is realizing his semi-regular craving for dozens and dozens of loaves of bread is mis-timed given current events in the province. “Look, every couple of months I like to splurge by sitting at my dinner table and just devouring loaf after loaf
In a stunning revelation that has rocked the community, it turns out that Smith and Sparks Street are, apparently, the same street. “The world suddenly makes a little less sense,” said a homeowner who lives on Smith, or so he thought. “If Smith is just
A stunning report has drawn a direct link between shoveling your driveway and the onset on COVID symptoms. Experts are saying this correlation may give spouses pause so as not to put their families at risk. “I was outside taking care of this late snowfall,”
The Kitimat RCMP are offering few details in a gruesome report that a Kitimat motorist has actually parked their vehicle inside their garage. “An act of such utter depravity requires discretion as to not upset the larger community,” said a local police spokesperson. “Rest assured
A report from a cohort of structural engineers have concluded that the copious amounts of graffiti on the dilapidated Nechako Centre structure may be the only thing actually keeping the building standing. “We’ve looked at the state of the building, its age and level of
Automation for the win! The Ministry of Transportation had been waiting patiently for a large snowfall in the Kitimat-Terrace area to finally unleash their new collection of snow-clearing Roombas. The automated vacuum systems aren’t just for getting stuck in your living room anymore! State of
The community of Kitimat has been rocked with allegations this week that there is no standard spelling of the Cablecar/Cable Car neighbourhood. Concerns first materialized from the Coast Mountain School District website, where their bus schedule is shared. “For your information, provided below are the
Reports in Kitimat indicate it’s wet. IT’S WET, EVERYONE! Residents are encouraged to take proper precautions and complain heavily about it to anyone within earshot.
In a sign of the busy times ahead for Kitimat, the community can now look forward to foreign travelers with the new Kitimat International Air Park! Soon, Kitimat’s sleepy air park will enjoy air traffic from major jumbo jets, bringing in passengers from Europe and
Amidst historical outcry over the destruction of local bears, the Conservation Officer Service is adopting a gentler approach, drafting firm but kind messaging they hope will reach the local wildlife in Kitimat. “Shoo, bear!” reads the note, kindly signed by the Conservation Officer Service. The