Blanket and warm cocoa advisory warning in effect for Kitimat
With up to 25 cm of snow anticipated for the Kitimat area, the community is currently under a blanket and warm cocoa advisory warning until further notice.
Residents are advised to drape a thick blanket over their shoulders when wandering their home, and to gently but firmly grip a warm mug of warm cocoa in both hands.
If necessary, residents should also look wistfully out their windows and sigh, as necessary.
When going to bed for the evening, it’s advised to be laying in such a way that the presence of your human body is indistinguishable from the duvet and sheets.
If you must drive anywhere, ensure that your spouse has preheated the vehicle before attempting any travel.
Finally, if possible, hibernate in your home for the following five months to avoid all of this.